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haha, Radical #2: Sayin Goodnight (Take one demo)

by haha, Radical

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about

Ptr rapping a take over a Killah beat. (Ryan Kieltyka to everyone else).

lyrics

I hate sayin goodnight to myself.

I remember the days when I was desperate,
When the mention of another's triumph made me lunge for it,
I thought I was born for it,
but I tried to deny it.
I was shown it,
all I could think to do was defile it,
but piles of styles could only hide the flimsiness of my tethers,
Back then, it really didn't matter whether I was alone or together,
All it took was a password, the last word of a poem
stocked in the pocket of my heart,
which really was was a piece of art,
sculpted from "my romantic nights of self",
I admit I needed help,
I admit I didn't know what help I needed.
Now I admit the seed is different than the deed.
But you need both to grow a tree
and I been blowin both,
thinkin that to grow is to be free
but when you grow,
sometimes you're taller than you need to be,
I could grab a me to see,
I could conjure a we to be,
but both would need a mirror.
And when you're self conscious, you are your own slave.
you can't say goodnight to yourself.
Know anyone else that's still up?

I remember the days when I was desperate,
when a simple spell such as the excited mention of an obscure artist who once intimate their soul to me in darkness was enough to ignite my romantic nights of self.

I long stopped wonderin the purpose of my burnin
always turnin it over,
thinking i just need a new position to see everything below and above,
I forgot that you need to be yourself before you can find love.
And i dont know if ill stop searchin,
certainly beats workin,
when you learn instead of tend.
I've been waiting all night tryin to imagine a tender end.

Is it gonna be now?

I'm not even sure what I said.

Are you goin that quick?
At least stay until the candle loses its wick,
Let our bodies douse the now,
an inferno sloppily loud.

I got a little scared,
so i got a little loud.

I got a little nervous,
so I got a little proud.

I wanted to be high,
so I fashioned a cloud,

never thinking that the here and now
would steer our sound a little down to the ground.

At least I'll be lookin up.

Come a little closer,
You don't have to say it out loud.

credits

released December 31, 2011
killah on the beat, ptr on the mic.

license

all rights reserved

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